Father of the groom speech: examples, a template, and what to say
The father of the groom often speaks at the rehearsal dinner, and more and more often at the reception too. Either way, the job is the same: thank the people who made the day happen, tell a story that shows who your son is, and welcome his new spouse into your family. Below are four sample speeches, a fill-in template, and advice on timing and what to say.
- How long
- 2 to 4 minutes, about 300 to 550 words. Shorter at the reception if several people speak.
- Structure
- Thank-yous → a story about your son → who he is now → the moment you knew → welcome his spouse → the toast.
- When
- Traditionally at the rehearsal dinner, which the groom's family often hosts. Many also say a few words at the reception.
- Avoid
- Embarrassing childhood stories, past relationships, money, and a long list of thank-yous.
What to include in a father of the groom speech
- Thank-yous. Thank the guests, especially those who traveled, and thank the other family. If you're hosting the rehearsal dinner, this is your welcome.
- A story about your son. One childhood or teenage moment that still says something true about him. Specific beats sweeping.
- The man he is now. Tie the story to who he's become in a sentence or two.
- The moment you knew. The phone call, the first dinner, the look on his face. Parents often see it first.
- Welcome his spouse. Say their name, what you've seen in them, and that they're family now. This is the heart of the speech.
- The toast. Raise a glass to the couple, by name.
Example speeches
Heartfelt father of the groom speech
Good evening, everyone. I'm Dan, Michael's dad. On behalf of my wife, Julie, and our whole family, thank you for being here. And to Jessica's parents, Tom and Linda, thank you for everything you've done to make this day happen, and for welcoming our son so warmly.
When Michael was ten, he signed up for the school science fair and decided to build a working volcano. Not the baking soda kind. He wanted it to be accurate. He went to the library, he took notes, and he spent three weekends in our garage building a plaster mountain the size of a dishwasher. On the day of the fair, it erupted beautifully, and then it kept erupting, across the gym floor, under the bleachers, and into the principal's shoes. He got second place and a very long talk.
I've thought about that volcano a lot over the years, because it's Michael in a nutshell. When he cares about something, he goes all the way. He doesn't do anything halfway.
So when he called us three years ago and said, "Dad, I met someone," and then talked for forty-five minutes without stopping, Julie and I looked at each other and knew. He was all the way in.
Jessica, from the first dinner you had with us, you fit. You laughed at my stories, you helped Julie in the kitchen without being asked, and you looked at our son like he'd hung the moon. We could not have asked for anyone better for him. Welcome to the family. We love you.
Michael, I'm so proud of the man you've become. Keep going all the way. Just maybe keep the eruptions small.
Would everyone please raise a glass. To Michael and Jessica.
A sample we wrote by hand. The people in it are made up. Yours is written from your own stories.
Funny father of the groom speech
Good evening! I'm Rick, the father of the groom. My only official job today was to wear a suit and stay out of the way, and I'm proud to say I've done one of those things.
Austin was the kind of kid who had a question about everything. Why is the sky blue? Why do we have to go to bed? Why does Dad sing in the car? That last one, I never got a good answer for. He asked so many questions that when he was about eight, I started saying, "Great question. Go ask your mother." Paige, I want you to know you are inheriting that system. He's going to have questions. You can send him back to me.
The first time Austin brought Paige to the house, our dog, who barks at everyone, including the mailman he's seen every day for nine years, walked up to her, sat on her feet, and refused to move. Austin looked at me and said, "Well, that settles it." He was joking. Mostly.
Paige, we've watched you make our son happier and more patient, and, believe it or not, a slightly better driver. You're kind, you're funny, and you have the dog's full approval, which in our house is the highest honor there is.
So please raise your glasses. To Austin and Paige. Keep asking each other the good questions.
A sample we wrote by hand. The people in it are made up. Yours is written from your own stories.
Short father of the groom toast
Good evening. I'm Bill, Scott's dad. Thank you all for coming, and thank you to Megan's family for sharing this day with ours.
Scott has always been the steady one, the friend who answers the phone at two in the morning. Megan, we've watched him light up since he met you. You make him laugh, and you make him brave. We're so happy you're family.
Please raise a glass. To Scott and Megan.
A sample we wrote by hand. The people in it are made up. Yours is written from your own stories.
Father of the groom speech for a son marrying a man
Hello, everyone. I'm Ray, Peter's father. My wife, Ellen, and I want to thank you all for being here today, and to say how grateful we are to Daniel's mom, Carol, for raising such a fine young man.
Peter has always been a builder. Lego towers, then treehouses, then, at twenty-three, a wooden kayak that, against all odds, actually floats. He likes to know how things fit together. He takes his time, and he gets it right.
When he introduced us to Daniel, he did something I'd never seen him do: he was nervous. He kept checking Ellen's face, then mine. Within an hour, Daniel had me laughing so hard at the dinner table that I forgot to be the dad who asks the tough questions. I never did get around to asking them. I didn't need to.
Daniel, you are generous, thoughtful, and quick to help anyone who needs it. You've made our son happier than we've ever seen him. You've been part of our family for a while, and today we get to say it out loud: welcome.
Please raise a glass with me. To Peter and Daniel. May you keep building, and may everything you make together float.
A sample we wrote by hand. The people in it are made up. Yours is written from your own stories.
Fill-in template
Copy this into a document and replace each [bracketed] part with your own words. Then read it aloud and cut anything that doesn't sound like you.
Good evening, everyone. I'm [your name], [groom's name]'s father. On behalf of [your spouse / our family], thank you all for being here. [A thank-you to the bride's or partner's family, and to anyone who hosted or helped.]
[A childhood story about your son that still says something true about him.]
[What that story shows about the man he is now.]
[The moment you knew [partner's name] was the one: the first time he talked about them, or the first time you met.]
[Speak to [partner's name]: what you've seen in them, and a clear, warm welcome to the family.]
[A sentence to your son: that you're proud of him, and a short wish or piece of advice.]
Please raise your glasses. To [groom's name] and [partner's name].
When does the father of the groom speak?
- At the rehearsal dinner, traditionally. The groom's family has often hosted it, so the father of the groom gives the welcome toast. Our rehearsal dinner toast guide has a host example.
- At the reception, if the couple asks, often after the father of the bride or as part of a joint welcome from both families.
- Coordinate with the other parents. Share drafts so you don't repeat the same thank-yous or tell overlapping stories.
- Ask the couple or the DJ exactly when you're on and who speaks before you.
Tips for writing and delivering it
- Write the way you talk. Short sentences are easier to say when you're emotional.
- Joke about yourself, not him. A little self-deprecation ("my only job was to stay out of the way") lands better than embarrassing your son.
- Give the welcome its own moment. Turn and speak to your new son- or daughter-in-law directly.
- Mention your spouse or co-parent by name if they're not speaking, and anyone being remembered, briefly.
- Practice it out loud two or three times and time it. Print it in large type or on numbered cue cards.
Frequently asked questions
Does the father of the groom give a speech?
Often, yes. Traditionally he toasts at the rehearsal dinner, which the groom's family usually hosts. Many fathers of the groom also speak at the reception, if the couple asks.
How long should a father of the groom speech be?
About 2 to 4 minutes, or 300 to 550 words at a relaxed pace. Rehearsal dinner toasts can be slightly more relaxed; reception toasts should stay on the short side.
What does the father of the groom say?
Thank the guests and the other family, tell one story about your son, share the moment you knew his partner was the one, welcome them into the family by name, and raise a toast to the couple.
What should the father of the groom avoid?
Embarrassing stories, past relationships, money talk, inside jokes, and long lists of names. Keep the focus on your son, his spouse, and your happiness for them.
How do I welcome my new daughter-in-law or son-in-law?
Say their name, mention one specific thing you've seen in them (how they treat your son, how they fit at your table), and say plainly that they're family now.
Can Said It Well write a father of the groom speech?
Yes. Choose "Parent" in the wedding questionnaire and share a story or two about your son and the couple. We write a speech timed to the length you choose, and you can read the opening free. The full speech, unlimited revisions, a PDF, and printable cue cards are $24 one time.